Offa’S Dyke Trail – Page 2 – Karen's Damn Long Walk

I started the day in a positive mood; positive that I did not want to back track at all.

So off we went following the marked path until we lost it. Using one of my apps we found it again but came to a sign telling us there was a diversion which meant I was grumpy with myself again. I had seen that on the website the day before but was too tired to study it.

We followed that trail and ended up back at the gate to the bloody castle again. F##k me days!! There, right in front of us was a notice with details of the diversion.

A bridge was out of action. We contemplated just taking the official route and risking a river crossing. We hadn’t seen any water courses here that looked uncrossable and we were both Te Araroa veterans who had crossed many proper rivers in New Zealand.

But best keep to the rules so off we went again, me cursing and swearing. The day was a shit show already.

Pandy was the next village on the trail so we decided that it would be a good idea to stop there and give me a short day and time to rest up. I am sure Kay was hoping for a major chsnge in my attitude

We arrived to find that the bnbs and pubs were full and jyst to add insult to injry I had a message saying I had used my months data already, a polar blast had arrived and I couln’t get the phone app working to top up.

We were given the number for Mary who would take us in for the night so I rang her. She sounded very old and doddery but she said she would be there to pick us up in 1o minutes that ended up about 30 minutes. I made Kay sit in the front with her as I did not feel like being polite.

Mary is 87 years old and tells us thst she has a new car and had taken a while to work out how to use the key and start the car. She has little sticky labels on the dash saying petrol, speed, lights, indicators. The console is also marker with go, reverse, hand brake etc. This is her first automatic car so she has a lot to learn.

The drive along the very narrow winding lanes to her house was a bit hairy, to say the least. Having lived her whole life in only two houses she gave us a running history of every cottage we passed, pointing out things, hands off the steering wheel and seemingly taken no notice of the road as she sped along. She talked at 100 miles an hour so we knew all about her 87 years of life by the time we reached her cottage.

I sat in the back laughing away and lost my bad mood completely.

Mary had a birthday recently and has all of her 57 birthday cards on display. We were given a running commentary of who they were from and how she knew them. The Post Office would need extra staff in May to cope with it all.

Having worked on the manual Telephone Exchange for 37 years she knew everyones business including Priness Anne’s conversation with a local landowner. Kay, being a bit a royalist, was able to name the man, which really impressed Mary.

We had tea from a pot, 3 pieces of velvet cake, a shower (do not flood it like some naughty man did 10 years ago), and Mary made sure we knew how to pull the curtaims so that they faded evenly, then it was time for a tour of her expansive gardens.

Mary still looks after them herself having made them from scratch 27 years ago, so we were introduced to nearly each plant separately. Thank goodness Kay knows about plants!

Conservatory where she says good morning to England

Mary prepared a salad dinner for us which was appreciated after a few days of instant noodles, porridge and cheese and crackers.

Then we went on another hair raising drive out to the Llanthony Priory. That was a place for monks to learn their stuff way back from the 12th Century until Henry 8th closed it down. Now it is another set of ruins with accomodation, a pub and a church. Mary knew every rock and person in the little pub.

Mary points out the Black Mountains , tomorrows walk

Mary Mary

We were then dropoed at the Skirrid Inn, the oldest pub in Wales. It also served as the court and the unlucky ones were hung under the stair case.

Everyone in there knew Mary or was related to her. We had a fun couple of drinks before ringing Mary to pick us up at 9pm.

That is a very late night fof hikers but wr still had to have supper and more cake before bed. We were exhausted from all of Mary’s constant chatter.

We couldn’t understand half of what they said.

We started the day determined not to miss any signs and managed to keep to that resolve except for a minor miss in the town of Monmouth and later a major one that cost us an hour of extra walking through long grass on a farm. Grr!

We could see where we needed to get to but we couldn’t take the short straight line route because of the thick prickly fences. In New Zealand one can just climb a wire fence. Not here! I was getting grumpy.

My body was not happy with me for taking it on another damn long walk. Some jet lag combined with sore thighs from the climbing yesterday , a sore shoulder and back, made for an unpleasant day for me.

We walked mainly through wooded areas that enthusiasic locals were trying to regenerate. Again that meant lots of wild nasty stff trying to scratch or sting us.

Being Saturday we met up with quite a few clean, fast people with little day packs who were just out for a nice stroll. Many with their dogs. They pissed me off!

Some were doing longer sections of Offa’s Dyke but from pub to pub with their gear being transported for them. They pissed me off as well. Gosh I was a grumpy bitch.

We were the odd ones. I imagine the talk at the pubs would have gone a bit like this.

“Did you see those two old ladies from New Zealand who were walking the FULL Offa’s Dyke?”

“Yes and they were carrying tents and a weeks food.”

“The bigger lady looked shattered. They were slightly mad, I think”

We stopped for coffee and a pastry in Marnmouth, a quaint town with narrow cobbled streets, a big church which provided a pew to sit and have a rest on. I downloaded another app that was suggested by some walkers we had met earlier. Maybe that would help with the route finding and my mood.

Our lunch stop was at a church out in the middle of nowhere. The vicars husband was there doing some maintenance work so we were told all about the history of the church, going back to 500AD. That meant a decent break in the sun drinking coffee provided by the church.

It was too early in the day for us to camp but he told us that they welcomed walkers to camp or sleep in the church. That was good news as one of my plans was to camp in graveyards. No crowds, usually toilets and taps to fill our water bottles. Being able to sleep inside a church was even better.

The afternoon was mostly through farms, lush green crops, funmy looking self shedding sheep and mole holes.

The shedule I had copied was not made for an unfit Granny with her house on her back, so we again, didn’t make target.

I ranted and raved a bit, well a lot, saying I wanted to go home and hike with a decent app and signage

Then ee came across the ruins of an old castle and decided to camp there the night. There was some mowed lawn and picnic tables so we were pleased. The house by the gate looked like a caretakers house and we didn’t want to have some grumpy lady come and send us on our way. So we got out of sight behind the moat wall and cooked our dinner before putting up our tents.

My theory was thaeat if we were found asleep we would be left alone.

A few tourists wandered around but left us alone. I had to crawl out and growl at a Woodpecker for tap, tap, tapping while I was trying to get to sleep. But I woke next morning in a better mood.

Category: Offa’S Dyke Trail

Day 3 White Castle to Pandy.

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Day 2 Saturday 8 June

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